Dear So and So - Guest appearance by Hubby

Dear Training Meetings,

Why do you suck to much?  I mean really, you take time away from my family and friends just so we can learn things we already know.  When you walk into these trainings you sit down and wait for everyone to show up.  After an hour of sitting there and introducing everyone you get started on the actual power point presentation.  Someone tell me why trainers have you read the bullet points word for word on these presentations?  Should you not be able to read them yourself and maybe the trainer has some sort of other input on what the bullet point is trying to make?  (wow this whole blogging to vent thing really works, I feel better already).

For three days i sat in a room with other managers thinking the same thing over and over, "LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!"  We get this book that has activities and follows the presentation, while a trainer reviewes the presentation and keeps everyone on track.  I dont understand why we cant just work the questions in the book, have the trainer there to ask questions, and maybe the three day course will take 1 day...


I understand that there were some very good questions asked at this training class, but the trainer is a person we call and have conference calls with on a regular basis.  Give us a reference guide and have us look up our own damn answers.  Everything in the corporate world is black and white anyways, why not give us the guide, let us make our own mistakes, learn from them and move on with our lives.


I am very tired of the retail environment and I am ready to move on from it.  So, training meetings, I would like to throw up a big middle finger to you since you are worthless and pointless...but the paid mileage is good.

Dear So and So- Hmmm

I love Dear So and So. Normally, I don't have an issue finding things to vent about. Yet, today, I'm rather chipper. International Delight Pumpkin Spice seasonal coffee creamer is BACK BABY, it's a GORGEOUS sunny day outside, hubby is going to WILLINGLY help me with chores and I live on the water at the beach. It's a good day. So I think all I have to vent about today are daily inconveniences.

Want to rant??? Grab the button and let us have it!!



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Dear dishes,

I clean you and put you away and you pile right back up again.  I. clean. you. and. put. you. away. and. you. pile. RIGHT. BACK. UP. AGAIN.  Mucho inconvenient.

Please figure out how to clean yourselves....I'll still put you away.  I don't mind that part...it's quick.

Thanks,
Lady of the House

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Dear Laundry,

We really need to come to a compromise.  I have no problem sorting you, putting you in the washer and then putting you in the dryer.  Don't you think we could come to a happy medium where you fold yourself and put yourself away?? 

I don't think that's too  much to ask.

Get on it,
Lady of the House

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Dear Judah-Man,

We get it.  You're fluffy.  You're adorable.  You look like a miniature lion.  You're king of the freakin' world.  Your little furry face is the highlight of my day and you have more personality than Bill Cosby, Katt Williams and Dane Cook....COMBINED.

BUT

Contrary to popular belief, your Daddy and I canNOT pet you EVERY WAKING MOMENT.  Your loyal subjects have other, not equally important but important never-the-less, things to do during our day.  Plus, our hands start to cramp after a while.

Please accept this for the hard truth that it is.

Wuvs,

Da Mommy and Da Daddy

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Dear Roxie-Baby,

You are an absolute JOY.  Your Daddy and I couldn't ask for a sweeter, better behaved, more beautiful, more loving and more loyal pound puppy.  The day we adopted you was one of the best days of both our lives.

I'm just wondering if you could maybe get a grip on the Roxie-hair tumbleweeds that are attempting to take over the house.  I vacuumed 2 days ago and there's already one bigger than Judah in the corner.  You're just too pretty to shave.  Figure it out.  Mkthanks.

Love,
Mommy

The Story Of Us...And Our Two Weddings

As promised in my previous post, ...Through My Recent God Pause, I've been working on the VERY beginning stages of a book my husband and I are attempting to write.  We have no idea what this will bring.  We have no idea where this will take us.  At the moment, we would like to have it published one day but we may change our minds in the future.

This book is a tribute to my father.  Dad is suffering from a neurological disease believed to be CJD and we have been told we will lose him by the end of the year.  Mr. Galloping and I are putting in writing what we've experienced, what we've learned and how we've survived my father's HORRID illness, our shotgun engagement, one shotgun wedding and planning a second, formal wedding.

I hope to shine some light on a disease that, in a year's time, only affects about 200 people in the United States.

I'm writing this post to pimp out our blog dedicated to documenting the journey of writing our book.  Go and check it out, if you like what you see...please let me know, follow along and grab the button for your sidebar!!  Please help us share our story!

My First Random Tuesday

This should be interesting. I've enjoyed reading other's Random Tuesdays but wasn't so quick to jump on the bandwagon. As an ex-news reporter random writing just didn't cut it! You see, I'm going against 5 years of college education and 2 years of career training and experience here kids!! Its appearing to be painful, liberating and oh-so-necessary all at the same time. Kinda like a brazilian bikini wax!

There are dishes in the sink that are BEGGING to be put in the dishwasher. I wish they would quit complaining and do it themselves. I'll never understand why dishes can't just leap into the dishwasher...it would make MY life so much easier.

I've come to really enjoy my ritual of sharing an apple with our Pomeranian Judah...
In case you didn't know...hes king of beasties. He gets SO excited when I pull an apple out of the fridge! I'll cut little pieces off as I'm eating it and he is such a little gentleman when he eats them. Roxie, our golden retriever mix waits patiently for the core of the apple....


I really should be working on the book my husband and I are writing. I've slacked off the past couple of weeks. My muse is napping I think. Bitch.

I hope my family in Atlanta isn't floating away. Mother Nature obviously has a bone to pick with the ATL. I can't imagine why.

On the flip side, its been mighty sunny and humid here at Panama City Beach. That, added to our neighborhood's FAB pool overlooking the bay has me looking like a Mediterranean girl rather than the white bread I am. And yes, I wear sunscreen. Maybe I'll change it up today and go to the beach. Maybe that's where my muse is. Bitch.

Well, dishes are calling, as is laundry, not as loudly as the beach though. And I'm supposed to be writing. I need to find my muse and kick her in the bitch bum.

Tuesdays are good. I think I'll be back next week. TTFN!

Dear So and So - Enough is Enough

Dear Husband,

I love you DEARLY. You mean the absolute world to me and you know there is no one else on this planet I would want to share this adventure with.....BUT.....enough is enough. Because I am your wife and I love you so much, I will cheerfully and gratefully keep our BEAUTIFUL home (that you work VERY hard to provide us) neat, tidy and healthy. Yet, remember darling husband that I'm your WIFE, YOUR PARTNER, YOUR SOURCE OF PEACE AND CALM....I'm not your mother, I'm not your babysitter, I'm not your maid. The laundry hamper is VERY CONVENIENTLY located behind the bedroom door. Has been SINCE WE MOVED IN 5 MONTHS AGO. I will happily draw up a map if necessary. If your clothes can't find their way to the hamper VIA YOUR PERFECTLY FUNCTIONING HANDS......they aren't getting washed. Period, the end.

If you wanna wear smelly, rumpled clothes, fine. But a smelly husband does NOT a frisky wife make.

Any questions??? Do NOT make me call your mother....crap, she's the one that created this monster....do NOT make me call MY MOTHER.


LOVE,
Your wife at the end of her rope.


P.S. What I don't understand is why you are so attentive (hamper, washing, ironing YOURSELF) about your work clothes and not your regular clothes.